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What if Conflicts were not Bad?

Very interesting TedxTalk on Conflict. It deals with the question: What if Conflicts were not Bad?

It talks about mediation without labeling it.

The important shift from trying to manage people with the conflict to ensuring there is a process in place that allows your parties to be vulnerable!

The video dates from 2015, but it gives some interesting perspectives for workplace conflicts. How do you deal with conflicts?


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Active Listening in Mediation

The object of active listening in conflict resolution is to acquire and demonstrate understanding of the other, which will serve as a basis for reaching joint decisions and resulting in resolving a conflict. In order to succeed in this, active listening has to focus on common problems in oral interpersonal communication. This presentation mentions the few ways in which active listening can be practiced and also deal with communication pitfalls during mediation.


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Mediation/Arbitration: An Alternative to Litigation: “Workplace Sexual Harassment, #MeToo & Finding A Resolution Process”

#METOO Trends and Highlights

Cyber Bullying Abusement Harassment Trolling

IN the past few months social media and every industry has been a flooded with allegations of sexual harassment. The silence has been broken, and the once considered “too powerful” and untouchable are being “handled” and striped of their positions/power. Sexual harassment is not industry specific, it is not new and the skeletons in the Walmart-size closets are busting out. Here are some statistics from the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission and news polls:

  • 75% of all workplace harassment goes unreported.
  • 30% of individuals who were harassed spoke immediately to their supervisor, unionrepresentative, managers or the Human Resource department.
  • “…sexual harassment training is easily mocked – and often brushed off…”
  • According to the Washington Post “between 1997 and 2014 the US Treasury” paid 235awards and settlements worth approximately $15.2 million for workplace violations on Capitol Hill.No industry is safe from sexual predatory behavior. And the behavior has been allowed to permeate the business/entertainment/ culture. Even the EEOC states that yearly training is not enough and is usually only focused on avoiding legal liability. After doing many EEOC mediations which lead to reviewing thousands of employment manual pages, state and federal rules, regulations, and policies, I am comfortable to say that there remains to be A LOT of work done if we wish to change the sexual harassment culture.Finding a Resolution Process

    We know that victims are ignored and paid off; and litigation and hefty settlements have not prevented predatory behavior. So what is the answer, and what should be considered when seeking arbitration and mediation as alternatives? Honesty, I am not sure, but I am confident that the Victim-shaming, fear, and the industry-cultural norms that allowed sexual harassment to go unchecked and underreported need deeper and broader systemic solutions.

    The following are brief points when considering other resolution options:

    Arbitration, Akin to Litigation –

  • Engaged as per employment contract provision(s), due process paranoia is a challenge.
  • Awards are usually confidential.
  • Victims often relive the incident like at a trial.
  • No appeals process.Mediation – Pros & Cons (limited and not exhaustive)
    • Pro- Empowerment- Many victims want an opportunity to face their abuser and ask “Why?”
    • Pro: Confidentiality- Victims are often ashamed and do not want, to have to relive the event multiple times.
    • Pro: Time – Much faster than litigation and arbitration.
    • Con: Confidentiality – Mediation and the possible agreement, are confidential. Theabuser often gets a chance to silence the incident/victim and is not truly held accountable.
    • Con: To Settle – Should a victim compromise and settle with the abuser?Stanley Zamor is a Florida Supreme Court Certified Circuit/Family/County Mediator & Primary Trainer and Qualified Arbitrator. Mr. Zamor serves on several federal and state mediation/arbitration rosters and has a private mediation and ADR consulting company. He regularly lectures on a variety of topics from ethics, cross-cultural issues, diversity, bullying, and Family/Business relationships.
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Workplace Conflict & Strategies for Management

Conflict is a normal and natural part of any workplace. When it occurs, there is a tendency for morale to be lowered, an increase in absenteeism and decreased productivity. It has been estimated that managers spend at least 25 percent of their time resolving workplace conflicts – causing lowered office performance.


NOTE: To enlarge the slides click this icon185194-200

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Improve Your Decision Making

Every day, individuals face situations where we are required to take decisions- big or small. Some of these decisions are categorised as important and urgent while others might be regular in nature. Regardless, we are needed to make the decisions and come to a conclusion. However, even if the said decision comes under the regular category is almost insignificant to us in our daily lives, a large group of us lack the ability to take the right choices or decisions, thus putting their professional life, family and relationships at stake.

Therefore, it is imperative for every one of us to be aware of the impact of all our decisions, even the smallest ones and seek help to improvise on it, if we know that we aren’t good at it or get a second opinion to just be sure. Few steps to improve your decision making are:

Step 1: Don’t Delay

Dedicate a sincere amount of time each day to work through your decision and take the same stand without getting manipulated.

Step 2: Shelve Ego & Emotion

Instead of searching for flaws and deficiencies in your own self, focus on the facts already available and work on them.

Step 3: Ask an Expert

A neutral third – party would help you to make decisions without any bias and will keep your objective as the primary thought.

Step 4: Question your Data

Seek trustworthy data without any deceit and keep questioning until you’re satisfied to skyrocket decision-making ability.

Step 5: Plan for Doomsday

The final step is to understand the underlying risks of the decisions you make. It is very critical to always be prepared for the worst case there could be.

A right decision at right time goes a long way in anyone’s life. We regret for not taking right decision when it was needed and when time lapses no remedial measure is available. Reach out to friends, family, experts because it is only you who can do things right for you. No one else can.

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Buddy’s Point to Ponder


What is an Anchor?

In normal usage, an anchor can be the stable rock supporting an effort or keeping an object in one place. Good or bad? When used to keep a boat or ship in place during normal use, it means you can always find what is anchored. During a bad storm, it can mean finding it at the bottom of the ocean, with the anchor doing more harm than good, unless the anchor line has enough flexibility to reduce risk at the same time.

In human terms, an anchor should have the action potential to be both the foundation and the best person to plan around when seeking a change. The flexibility to be both the voice of reason and the spirit of motivation. Always strive to be an effective anchor while being flexible enough to meet all needs. Be the anchor!